Recent studies done by major Universities have concluded that women are cheating on their significant others by an average of 60%. That’s 6 out of every 10 women in a relationship are having or have had an affair outside of their relationship that they are currently involved in and that number is on the RISE!
To make matters worse, here’s what Dr. David Holmes a psychologist at Manchester University has added to this staggering number of infidelities, “The biggest difference(between the percentage of men cheating as opposed to women) is that women are much better at keeping their affairs secret,” he says. ”If you look at the studies into paternity, even conservative figures show that between 8 and 15 % of children haven’t been fathered by the man who thinks he’s the biological parent.” I read this and nearly fainted at that thought… Notice how he said… GULP!!!! CONSERVATIVELY! That mean that number of men out there Fathering children that are not THEIR OWN may be even higher than 15%. WOW!!!!!! And how unfair is this to the child? Every single child on earth deserves to know who their REAL father is.
If that wasn’t enough….
Here’s what Medical Daily had to say: “Researchers conducted a survey of 4,000 self-professed adulterers and found that women are more promiscuous than men, with women having an average of 2.3 secret lovers compared to men averaging at 1.8 mistresses.” They also said this… “Female cheaters are also significantly more likely to fall in love with their extra-marital lovers than male adulterers with 57 percent of female participants report being in love with their current affair partner and only 27 percent of male participants reporting the love for their illicit lovers.” Is there any hope??? I think there might be some light at the end of tunnel!!!
If you’re like me, you must be saying to yourself… WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! This is insane. How could so many women be cheating on their men??? But is it insane? Are women to be thought of as horrible human beings for seeking sex/attention outside of their monogamous commitments?
When I first started reading up on why people cheat and in particular, why women cheat, the only thing that really came to me as a surprise was the amount of women cheating and their ability to keep it secret but as I read on and on the reasons why they were cheating were already so obvious to me. I knew why they were cheating but it was nice to have some concrete confirmation as to why.
Here’s something Dr. Pope has said: “More and more neurological research is revealing that male and female brains are programmed differently when it comes to relationships,” said Pope. “The results of our survey bear this out, with our adulteresses seemingly seeking something far more emotionally meaningful from their affairs than their male partners.”
This is from Psychology Today: “…women have secret lovers, primarily because they’re not getting their needs and desires met in their marriages. Try as they may, wives are often unable to reach their husbands. Feeling stifled, unfulfilled, frustrated, and helpless in their marriages, they step outside of their marriages. Taking the step is in itself empowering. The affair is a daring active choice, not a more-of- the-same passive response. It screams out loudly “Enough! Something’s got to give, either the marriage/relationship or me.” That’s only the first step to autonomy and power. It takes a daring wife to have an affair but an even more daring wife to go into therapy to repair her self and/or the marriage…. A common myth is that the affair is about sex. It is not. For the most part, sex was better at home before romance eroded. Screaming fights or silent simmering hostility erodes romance and distinguishes the flames of passion. Chances are that problems in your sex life are not about the quality, but the quantity. Fighting to the death or suffering in silence snuffs kills sexual desire for most wives(note how he didn’t say husbands!). And there’s less and less sex in the marriage. If insufficient sex is the result of unsatisfactory marriages and affairs the result of unhappy marriages, what are the causes? What do wives want? It isn’t only that they desire emotional engagement. It isn’t only that they desire sexual passion. It isn’t only that they desire safety and protection along with autonomy and independence. I have found that wives want mutuality, equal power relationships, and recognition from their husbands. Devotion, love, and commitment without passionate sex, fun, and excitement is the steak without the sizzle. For wives to feel sexy they need the sizzle.” Read that last part again and again and again!!!
That’s a lot to handle, isn’t it? Now what? Is there any hope for a truly wonderful happy and monogamous relationship??? Can you give her the sizzle?
I have some strong feeling about cheating. They might not be in line with rest of the Dating Community but FUCK THEM, who cares!
Cheating when you’re in a committed relationship is just downright wrong! If you make that promise to a supposed lover and a best-friend, then keep that promise at all costs or walk! As the saying goes… “Shit or get off the pot!” I will never endorse cheating.
I’ve been cheated on in the past by someone very dear to me and let me tell you just in case you’ve never experienced that harsh reality… It’s the worst thing that could ever be done to you by a significant other. The hurt that is caused by your partner having an erotique sexual encounter outside of the relationship is like no other. It took me months to get over the pain I felt. I hated her! I went to bed every single night cursing her name. I cried and I cried. I thought about forgiving her. I thought about getting revenge on her. I was an emotional mess. I couldn’t figure out how to handle what had happened to me. How could she do this to me???? How could I have trusted such a horrific partner??? What was so much better about him?
Somewhere between the healing process and cursing her name to the Gods I came to a conclusion, it was an epiphany! All of a sudden that dark cloud of anger I was carrying around with me for so many months was lifted off of me. I saw some sunlight. I cracked a smile and felt better about it all and just as soon as that dark cloud dissipated away a new one formed. This one was even darker and greyer. I was scared! This new feeling was even worse than being cheated on.
What had happened was that I, for whatever reason, forgave her. I let go of the hate and I saw hope. I said to myself… “That’s just who she was. No other woman in the world would do that to me again” and it felt awesome to believe in the possibility of having another happy relationship again and just as soon as I started feeling good about the maturity level I had reached by deciding to forgive her(In my mind and not in the sense of taking her back into my life. We were definitely over for good!) and being content with finding another woman who was “nicer and more trustworthy”. I started to feel a sense of doom and gloom again. I instantly realized that the reason why she cheated wasn’t because she was a bad person it was because I drove her to that point of cheating on me. I realized that reason why she cheated on me was because she was looking/searching for something that meant the world to her, something that she had to have in her life that I wasn’t capable of giving her. I was to blame! I was the reason why she cheated! Maybe we had that special something in the beginning, maybe not, but for whatever her reasons were, they were valid enough to her at that point in our relationship to cheat on me and seek out what she was missing in her life.
Imagine how I felt when I realized that there was a good chance that all of my relationships would possibly turn out the same way(The studies above prove this). I realized that if I couldn’t figure out what women really wanted and why they wanted it, there’s a good chance I would be cheated on again. I realized that if I didn’t figure out how to give women what they wanted in a relationship they would keep cheating on me or walking away from me.
I wondered why there was never a course in High-School teaching men and women how to have successful relationships. How come nobody anywhere was teaching people on a grand scale how to have a fulfilling relationship???? The world revolves on relationships. It revolves around marriage. Marriage is 300 Billion dollar a year business… Why is there nobody teaching us how to give our chosen mates what they want without losing sight of ourselves and what we need??? Why is NO ONE ANYWHERE teaching us from an early age how to have a successful marriage? Makes no sense, does it?
I bet by now you’ve forgotten that I actually have some “GREAT NEWS FOR YOU?!?!?!”, haven’t you?
Here it is… Despite all the cheating going on… By learning how to stimulate your partner in the ways that makes her feel alive, satisfied emotionally/sexually and provided for you can more than likely prevent her from cheating on you! You can now save ALL of your FUTURE relationships from destruction. How awesome is that?
The 60% of men being cheated on are being cheated on because they are doing a horrible job at keeping their women emotionally excited. They’ve become lazy and content. They think that just because they are in a relationship that they can slack off and take his woman for granted!
The 15% of men who are Fathering a child that is not their own have never learned what woman want and now they are paying the ultimate price. Not only are they raising a kid that isn’t their own, they are ALSO BEING CHEATED ON AT THE SAME TIME… Double Whammy!
Finally, there is school for relationship management. Finally you can learn how to become the man that makes his Wife and partner smile each and everyday. Finally you can almost 100% keep your lady so enthralled with you that she will never look in the eyes of another man and actually go through with her fleeting flirty thoughts about him.
Problems will always arise in relationships. Fighting and disagreeing is almost impossible to avoid. I have learned many lessons in that area and will continue to learn more everyday. I’m not the foremost authority for dealing with fighting and disagreements that may arise although I’ve been through a lot so I feel as if I can help you with that but what I am an expert in is teaching men how to become more attractive, grow in positive ways, develop the ultimate confidence in himself and keep their women from ever cheating on them.
Become better at becoming the person you’ve always dreamed about and you will have stronger and better relationships that are emotionally stimulating and rewarding to both you and your significant other. If you find yourself in a relationship than you might as well make it the best relationship possible. Don’t do this by being dishonest or manipulation. Do this by being genuine and because you want to! Do this because you want to make her life better as you walk down the path of making yours better as well!
I have a saying that I’ve always said: “Leave them better than you found them!” Give her a great lasting impression of yourself and men in general! If you don’t understand now why this is imperative, than the more you go out and meet women and the more relationships you find yourself in, the more you will understand what I meant by “Always leave them better than you found them!”
Women have more opportunities than ever before to meet “Other Men.” Think about…. Just a few years ago, there wasn’t the internet, there was any form of social media, men weren’t working as many hours, couples were having kids at an earlier age, there was no text messaging, locks on your phone or smart phones, marriages were once considered sacred, there wasn’t talk-shows promoting infidelities as something trendy or cool, etc….
Years ago it was hard to have an affair without being caught. Times were different and people’s mentalities were much different as well. The modern empowered woman is looking for something very specific from her man and by all means if that’s what she wants than she deserves it. We all deserve to have whatever it is we want and if we are not getting it, than you should seek it somewhere else! The only problem is, that people, both men and women are seeking that something else at the expense of someone else and typically will risk hurting someone else just to get it.
By studying Dating and Relationship education you can learn how to have longer more meaningful relationships. You can learn about everything under the sun that women want. You can learn how to communicate better, have a better sex life and make her shiver in bed with ecstasy, how to handle disastrous situations in a manor that empowers the both of you. You can learn how to be the man and how to let her be the woman without compromising your values or hers!
The Dating Community is a gift to both men and women. Never forget this. Like I’ve said many times before… We didn’t learn this stuff in school. There was NO college or high-school class on relationship management. No classes on how to become more attractive. No classes on how develop ones self into a powerful and confident person.
We were taught to learn all of this on our own and through our personal experiences over time but for most of us we didn’t have enough experience to learn these lessons, nor did we have enough chances. Instead we found ourselves at an older age lonely, depressed, inexperienced, deprived of attention from women and scared to death to walk up to a beautiful woman and start talking to her. We found ourselves lost with nowhere to turn.
Now is your chance to learn. Now is your chance to grow! Don’t waste anymore time having relationships that only end in disaster, cheating or disappointment. Become the man that is naturally/genuinely attractive to women and become the man that you only dreamed about. You owe this to yourself and ANY woman you ever meet.