In a nutshell…. Love in the minds of women is conditional and love in the minds of men is unconditional and this is where most break-ups and arguments start. It’s a lack of understanding on both genders to fully understand or empathize with the others genetic coding and their long and short term needs.
Let me start off by quoting a man by the name of Briffault. In may ways, he was a genius and summed up female behavior as truthful and eloquently as a caterpillar turning into a butterfly. He cuts through all the bullshit and gets right to the core in just a few short sentences.
The female not the male determines all the conditions of the animal family. Where female can derive no benefit from association with the male no association takes place.
Past benefit provided by the male does not provide for continued or future association.
Any agreement where the male provides a current benefit in return for a promise of future association is null and void as soon as the male has provided the benefit.
A promise of future benefit has limited influence on current/future association with the influence inversely proportionate to the degree to which the female trusts the male.
I would suggest that you re-read that again and again until you can almost commit it to memory. In just a few short sentences Briffault sums up the male/female relationship conundrum and not just certain relationships between men and women but ALL relationships. Don’t be fooled. It IS the truth!
SO… Let’s talk about love and how this law pertains to it.
Like stated above, “Love is conditional in a females mind”. And as Briffault said, if there no benefit to the female than no such association shall take place.
And what are the benefits that most females attribute to being with a man? If you’ve been studying dating advice you should be able to answer this easily. This is where we get the term DHV from and now you should know why that is so important to incorporate it into your game.. Demonstrations of higher value. For those of you who are unfamiliar with DHV’s, I’ll break it down to you.
Here’s a short list of the most important DHV’s
Pre-selection (which means other beautiful women want you)
Leader of Men
When you meet a woman you will want to convey demonstrations of higher value so that she will instinctively come to realize that you are a suitable option for her to have sex with. Even though it is just an act of sex or it may be a casual romantic experience that you share with her, on a deep genetic level she will need to know that you are still a man that can and will provide for her and a potential baby with the benefits that she deems necessary for her(the baby is just a tool that she will use to keep the man or the source of his benefits) survival. Women are always screening for this in the men they chose to be with and even though it may be just sex, on a subconscious level she will need to know that if she was impregnated by you that she will be safe for the next 9-months and thereafter.
Whether you’re an Alpha male that will ensure her that if she had baby with you you will be of an exceptional gene pool or the fact that you may be Beta-Provider she will still be on the look out for any benefit that she can derive from you and if you have the benefits that she needs as well as the fact that you’re an attractive man to her, she will take a risk and have sex with you.
Women will confuse LOVE for benefit! And they will have no idea that is what they are doing.
When it comes to serious long-term relationships, a woman’s screening process will become even more acute as you get to know each other better. She will carefully look at who you are as a man, she will test your masculinity at any chance she can get, she will study what you can offer to her both short and long term and decide from there if she’s willing to become monogamous with you. Because if a woman chooses to become monogamous with you, she would have already carefully weighed what you have to offer versus what the other men have to offer that she is talking to or seeing at the same time and make her decision from there. She will also always weigh you and what you are offering against anyone else that may step into her life. Yikes!!!!!!
If they chose to become committed to you than that’s a great thing in most cases just so long as you weren’t put into the Beta provider category. The Beta provider is THE WORST THING FOR A MAN EVER! This means that even though you may be a Beta-provider you still beat all the offerings at that moment and only that moment. The problem is that Beta man who has won the woman will stay Beta because that is the behavior that actually won the love of his woman and will be reluctant to change his habits out of fear that he will lose the woman.
Why??? Because at the time of commitment towards a monogamous relationship she has CONVINCED herself that you are what she truly wants AT THAT TIME AND THAT TIME ONLY and it will 100% not be what will captivate her heart and keep her sexually interested for life! Only an Alpha male with great provider traits will keep a woman emotionally and sexually satisfied for a long period of time and even he will have to keep his game at his best.
This is why ALL nice guys get dumped, divorced, left for broke and cheated on. It is because he was not being the man in the relationship, she was. He allowed himself to ONLY be there for her bidding and women will tire quickly of this type of man. They get bored very quickly because he allows himself to be walked on and fails her many tests over time. This type of guy was good on paper! And when a guy looks good on paper women will convince themselves that he is a real catch. It also gives them bragging rights to their friends and family. Essentially, it will raise her value while still providing the benefits she deems necessary.
Women need a man to be a man. When she assumes the role of the man it will start to repulse her and at the same time make her lose all respect and attraction for you. The same goes for the Alpha male who then turns Beta for her sake. She broke you and because she broke who you are, she would have lost attraction and respect for you. How could an Alpha man who won her heart be broken? She will see this and when she does, it will be almost impossible for you to keep her interested in you.
Women, think they want one thing…. They think that if they can change the Alpha male into a Beta that she will love you even more, be happier, more secure but this may be true in the very short term but over any extended period of time the opposite will be true. The truth is that what a woman says she wants and needs to feel more secure in a relationship is not true at all.
How can a woman be secure with a man that she can change so easily?????? If she can change you and your character than what does that say about you in other areas of your life and the benefits that you are capable of providing for her? This is why she will continually test you. She wants to make sure that you are who you say you are.
You see, the Beta provider role will ensure her that you will at all costs do her bidding and cater to her female whims at the drop of a hat. She will feel safe with you and love the fact that you “give” her so much more than the Alpha/Bad Boy. Beta-providers are also usually viewed as monogamous which means his benefits will not be shared with another woman AND WOMEN HATE SHARING THEIR BENEFITS. He is a win for her. Hence… “I married such a nice-guy” or He’s soooo nice” or “He’s so much nicer to me than my last boyfriend”! Nice in this sense and only this sense means BETA. Please don’t confuse the two. An Alpha, a real Alpha male will still be nice to his woman.
On a surface level to her, she will THINK that’s what she wants and needs(usually because she has given up on Alpha/Bad Boys because of their lack of certainty within the relationship and the fact that she hasn’t found an Alpha that will stay faithful and who still treats her like a lady) but over time, like Briffault said, once that benefit has been provided, that promise of future association will become null and void unless more benefits are provided… And the vicious cycle of her demanding more from her man and him giving more will slowly eat away at her attraction for him because she will slowly start to lose respect for her chosen man that doesn’t have or show any balls and once again she’ll find herself on the prowl for Alpha sperm either while she’s still in the relationship or she will discard the Beta and hunt for another Alpha. Either way, if your a Beta provider, you lose. You lose her, your dignity, your masculinity, your money, your heart and in some cases your children.
You will only want to provide benefits to her if she is doing her part in the relationship. You have to work for her love and to be successful in dating and long term commitment and she will have to work for yours! That is the magic balance. You can not give freely. She will only give to you if you are giving to her and the same is true about you. You should only give to her if she is giving.
So… Where am I going with this??? I’m not really sure but it seems like a point to start to explain what you can do to maintain a woman’s interest for the long term and to tell you that you should give up on trying/hoping to have a woman truly understand and sympathize with what it is like to be a man. She is basically incapable of really understanding a mans dilemma.
As a man, you will want to always be at your best and if you’ve chosen to be with a woman than you need to fully accept these facts and be prepared to work for her loyalty and attraction for life. Is that a bad thing??? I don’t think so, especially if you love the woman you’re with and want to spend your life with her.
Female Hypergamy(dating a higher value man other than yourself) and Briffault’s law are both things you will need to study and master to keep your woman into you and only you.
In my relationship, I’m always trying to do my best. I do my best for me first and foremost but as I’m improving my life, my mind, my finances, my body, my understanding of women and life I know that it also puts me into a category of elitist men, the 2% of men in the world that will captivate and motivate a woman to stay with me. The more you better yourself the more capable you are of keeping women seriously attracted to you. It’s a win win situation.
I’ve been the Beta provider and have got destroyed women. Can I blame them or hate them? No, I can not. I accept all the blame for my past failures and have extensively studied them and learned from them. I have no ill feelings towards the women who have hurt me in the past. they were only doing what comes natural to them and because I didn’t understand the game or how their minds work, I lost. I lost their attraction, respect and hearts along with a shit load of money. At the same time, I gained a unique perspective. A perspective that most men do not have and that is worth it’s weight in gold. I am among the 2% of men.
Think about it…. If you are amongst the 2% of men out there, how hard do you think it would be for your woman to find someone better? It will be almost impossible. She would almost certainly have to try out 98 other men before she will run across someone of your caliber. And if you can make her feel the most sexually alive that she’s ever felt, giving her explosive orgasms while maintaining your Alpha Masculinity, you will have a woman that loves you and only you for life. It will be almost impossible for her to find someone to take your place. And if for some reason you did break-up, I promise you that she will be comparing EVERY other man against you for LIFE! She will always wish they were you! It will torture her for life. She will never be able to fully get over you! I promise you that.
In the so called Manospehere or Red Pill mentality there are a lot of men hating on women because of their innate nature, their solipsism and hypergamyrous (Is that spelled correct?) behavior and that is where and why I think they will fail to have in their lives the women that they truly want. They want women to be something they are not.
I come form a place of acceptance. I know exactly what I’m getting into with a woman especially if she’s beautiful and used to men catering to her. Do I like it???? HELL NO! Does it frustrate me at times? HELL YES! But I will never be able to change them and nor do I try to change it. I accept that is what they are, take appropriate actions and because I love to have a beautiful woman that I can call my own on my arm, I accept the fact that if I don’t do my best in my life and with her than she will leave me at some point. Just like I will leave her at some point if she’s not doing her best for herself, me and the relationship.
As a man, you have the power to walk away from an unhealthy situation while knowing that because you are bettering yourself and that you are the prize that you can easily replace her. The same CAN NOT BE SAID FOR HER. This may sound mean but it’s the truth, you can replace a woman a hell of a lot easier than she can replace you!
I hope you enjoyed this post…. I would love to hear your thoughts and commentary as I’m sure there is so much more to be said. I could have written another couple of thousand words easily about this topic but I think I covered some major points.